Hi, my name is Melody and I am a recovering control freak. That’s right. I am confessing it out loud to the whole world. Well not really the whole world, because anyone who already knows me would say this is nothing new to them. However, it is a little freeing to type these words in cyberspace!
I have always known this about myself, but lately it has become more and more evident. For instance, the very blog you are reading should have been ready to launch months ago.
I have held off on going live with it because all of the photos I wanted to put on here were not ready yet. Either I couldn’t find time to take them, the photographer who did take them didn’t get just the right shot (in my opinion…lol) or I didn’t have the time to edit the ones that were good enough to post.
So today was the day I was going to buckle down and get it all done. However, there is just one problem. I have known in my heart from the beginning that going in the direction of putting these pictures on here wasn’t really the true purpose of this blog, but it was what I WANTED TO DO! Sound familiar?
You know in your heart that what you are doing isn’t what the Lord has told you to do, but you do it anyway. Now, I am not even talking about something morally wrong. It could be something really good. It just isn’t what God has told you to do.
As a result it steals your peace and joy. Not to mention, wastes a lot of valuable time. Why are we like this? It’s crazy if you think about. We cause ourselves so much aggravation simply by not listening to that still small voice.
As for these pictures, every time I have tried to work on getting them ready for the blog it has been completely and totally frustrating. Everything that could go wrong did. You would think the lack of peace I experienced should have been my sign to let it go…but I continued to press on!
Why? Because I am a control freak and I like to do things my way. Thank goodness I am learning, however slow it might be, to relinquish my plan to Him. I am sure I will eventually get them on here…in His time. And when it is His time, it will go smoothly.
Does anyone else struggle with this?